and it was smoky, so smoky.

The sewing machine just caught fire. Wisps of smoke were billowing from the machine that emitted a foul odour. I sat there watching the sewing machine sizzle.

I am suffocated. But not by the smoke, but instead by the worries I have in my mind.

***

For the record, the sewing machine really did break down and I am bothered by certain issues.

I want to be a better person. Really. And I want to get rid of my bad habits, as many possible. Maybe not all. I don't think that's possible. So I'd really appreciate if anyone who knows me well enough can give me constuctive feedback. Then I'll try my best to change.

Haha, looking forward, looking up. We really have to look at the brighter side of life. Cause, life itself has been unfair enough and if we continue to be pessimistic, it's gonna be depression.

of marina barrage and cafe cartel.

Yes! CA is OVER. How long have we waited and how long have we mugged.

My attempts to mug chinese went down the drain. LOL. Looks like it's hard to focus after saturday. xP The carnival wasn't what I expected it to be. And there were many many people from anderson going there. Majority from 3/1. (: Toured the whole area with chin, lionel and vicom. Then we went to the top for jumpshots. Fun and tiring. But the highlight was actually dinner.

Company 1 walked 25 minutes from marina barrage to the mrt station because we didn't want to wait for the bus. Sang random songs along the way. Don't need to go choir liao at the rate I'm starining my throat. And mslim's coming tomorrow somemore.

Cafe Cartel-ed with 19 other people. But since the group was so big, we were sort of broken up. Ended up with xianlong, huixiang, justin, tianning and zhanrong. Played truth or dare. Whacky fun! But our meal was delayed by more than an hour. LOL. And the others had to way. Trained home with huixiang, zhanrong and sarah.

What was said at Cafe Cartel had better stay there. I hope.

不务正业

I am 不务正业-ing. Yeah. That's my version of chinglish.

There are so many tests this week. Especially this week. There's chem and bio tmr. Please tell me why I'm not mugging now. I should. I really should.

You're a slacker.
Just this quick one. I really wanna do well for this term even though it's only like 10%. There's no reason not to do well.

there's no such thing called privacy,

There's no such thing called privacy.

The sunday teams published that last week as its special topic and I realised it for myself during the first period in class today.

It is alerting that teachers are reading students' blogs. Not new, just some astonishing news after mugging full-time yesterday. To ms yep or any other teachers that are reading this post, salutaions. Welcome, I've nothing to hide. (:apart from the occasion ranting and cold jokes i have in store sometimes

Ok, it didn't come as that rude a shock. I'm still slumped on the chair, not sitting upright or anything.

Today wasn't a very good day. I got back my summary and walah, 11/20. At least I didn't fail. And I'm proud to say that I didn't fail higher chinese! (: Geog test was alright. Didn't know how to answer the first question but managed to complete the paper.

I don't feel like posting about choir. It's been one hell of a day.

it's intepretation nothing more.

I've got a point to make. Viewer's dicretion advised.

I always liked sleeping with her.

She would be waiting for me every night, resting invitingly. I gravitated towards her and laid my aching body onto the bed before staring at her. Then, I twisted my head to give her a whiff of my scent, burning with longing. Exhausted as I might be, I never failed to plunge my lips to her before the final act. It was so soothing. Then finally, I would rest my head onto her body before snuggling deeper into the confines of the quilt to commit the final act.

I slept.

***

her refers to a pillo. What were you thinking of?

This was inspired by recent physics lessons, where seemingly innocent intepretations were translated into suggestive innuendos. 3/1's really good at inferring. Infer until laugh. LOL.

I was dreading friday you know. Look at thursday's post. And it didn't go too well sad to say. I didn't do well for the maths test cause my stomach wasn't feeling too good. Then I got back chinese. Yeah, I failed again. 12/35. epic failure. I don't see why I should continue in my struggle in chinese. maybe it's because of the bonus points and the fact that i've already been hanging in there for 2.5 years. just 1.5years more to go. don't give up.

Then it was tgif after that. (: Slacked in class before choir.

I leant things that I've never encountered during friday's choir session. Awe-striking!

And there were auditions. I sang this love and ms chai gave me this -.- face. Lol. Famaliar wad. Hope I make it! And gladwin ang, you are in because you have no competition. HAHA.

Watched the devil wears prada until 3 this morning. First time i slept so late sia.

the reciprocation, imminence.

I should have expected it. That imminent reciprocation.

At the way that I've been treating X kinda make me expect when the same treatment will return. X's not stupid I know. It's been so long since we first met, I can't remember. But I can't dispel the demons that still haunt me and accept X. Trapped I supposed, I'm a victim too but sympathy extends way beyond my reach and into X's. And everytime I think about it, I still feel suffocated by the mere thoughts and the nature of such an action. Rejecting X hasn't been the greatest thing I've ever done. I know. Like a bully expecting imminent reciprocation.

Physics test was a disaster despite the effort I put into studying it. ): And I'm not looking forward to tomorrow after thinking about the aftermath of the physics test. With confirm-fail chinese results and another maths test which must be passed, it's hard not to be worried.

the reason why ne is good.

Yay! A few good things happened today!

Jess and me got 10 cip hours for our role as ne ambassadors! (:

I finally did ok for english against some odds. Yay.

The 10 cip hours was a good deal lol. Consider the 2 to 3 hours of work which we did over a span of time. Maybe even more. So 10 hours really was reasonable. Doesn't matter much now. 10 hours is still quite a lot. So I still need 50 odd hours to complete 100 hours. If you guys have any cip event in stored, please drop by a notice. :D

I spent my three days of break stoning at home and tidying up my room a little. And watching resident evil. Just after playing zombie infection. It was a temporary fixation on zombies. I have no idea why I'm addicted to all the games that willy sent. Ok, too fun le. Maybe that's the reason why I wasn't online yesterday. Catan was a time drainer.

There's alot of work and tests to be done. Like chem and maths and physics test tmr. My l1r5 for this term counts on all except maths and chinese. Must get 10 and below!

Ok, I'm bored. Maybe I should do maths now....

don't give me attitude.

Ok, I'm pissed that my sister kept using my account to login and play comp just because she locked up hers.

And she didn't even ask for permission. ~~~

Just a few things in my mind that happened the past week: failed e maths test. made announcement on stage. screwed chinese tests very very badly. kept being at the wrong place wrong time.

This week meant alot to me. It opened my eyes to alot of things that made me ponder on how naive I really had been and how much people can do. As in the kind of things that you really didn't expect them to. And how people like to take others for granted. Damn, just thinking about it makes me wanna hate the whole gang of them who think they are a cut above the rest and show it with those attitudes. The saying is true, a few rotten apples do spoil the whole basket. It's a little sad.

That's not my loss. It's yours. One more person that doesn't think you're the best thing in the whole wide world. I'd rather study chinese. and concentrate on not screwing up physics spa trial after screwing the trial trial.

Yesterday was fun! Ok, I really liked the National Day Carnival. It's very enjoyable and there's so much to do. Watch teachers sing, laugh in a haunted hospital, and patronising your own class. It's cool alright. And choir made 100+ during the sales of tidbits. Not bad sia. Considering what we have to work with.

Then went 3/1 outing@cwp with (not in order): willy, siewmun, dimeng, xianlong, jerome, jingfang, huixiang, kuanting, wingsang, joyce and waisiong. Ate at seoul garden and watched up later. Up was good. Up was very good. Nice show, recommended. Then went library with huixiang before going home.

I spent a grand total of $30 approx. God knows how broke I am.

And that's why I didn't step out of the house today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALICIA!

this saturday. so calm so boring.

Today was really peaceful. My sisters were out and the house was empty, save me and my maid.

So I took the chance to clear my bio homework and did a little reading up on chem. And i still felt happy even though i squandered the rest of the day watching sitcoms and movies like you don't mess with the zohan.

then i decided to have a long chat with gladwin before going swimming. tiring sia. after not swimming for so long, i'm like a fish out of water.

ate dinner. leftover tony roma roated chicken leg and baked potato. i missed that for lunch. ): but i had homemade chicken porridge instead. then wasted the rest of the night playing handphone games before using the comp. there, i summed up my day.

i won't want to go around calling other peoples' cca gay.